Rock Chalk

I’m not a huge sports fan.  Never been into the whole March Madness phenomenon.  Recently, I had a conversation with Jake about picking an activity-at least one (besides video games) to get involved in and I would support his choice.  I left it open as far as music or sports or even some kind of theater activity.  He has taken karate, piano and t-ball in the past.  He just didn’t get into any of it.  Anyway, all that to say he has yet to make a choice.

I not-so-secretly have in mind what I would like for him to do.  Play basketball.  My boy has some height on him.  And, yes, I know this could change.  (When I played b-ball in elementary school, I was the center at 5′5″.  And I haven’t grown since 5th grade.  Not height-wise, anyway.)  His pediatrician thinks he will be over 6 feet tall. 

My mindset in trying to get him to get interested in basketball was for me to take an interest in b-ball.  What better time to take interest than March Madness??  So I have been watching KU play and even filled out a tourney bracket.  So tonight, instead of going to church (oops) we watched KU play.  I think between my interest and that fact that I tell him KU is my Alma mater, he actually got into the game tonight.  And it was a great game.  It was a great opportunity for me to teach him some of the rules and terminology.  Now, hopefully, he will be interested in joining a league next year.

Mission accomplished.  Hopefully.

The irony is not lost on me, Part Deux

The kids in our family range from 8 to newborn-arriving any day now.  My youngest sis is pregnant and has a two-year-old, so she is relatively new to this parenting thing.  B.C.(before children), she was extremely judgemental about how the other kids behaved-4 boys.  She would rant and criticize and give dirty looks-I’ll never forget it.  She would look and me or my other sister and tell us to get the kids under control.  I was offended at first, as I believe that boys will be boys and if they are having fun and not harming anyone or anything, then there is no problem.  She wanted to be able to hear the TV over the kids or keep the sound level to a dull roar.  She was ruthless about this FOR YEARS.  Then I realized that, one day, she would have her own children.  And I would need to be patient to see this to fruition.

Karma is a bitch.  My niece can make noise and throw tantrums and is Queen of the “Wet Noodle,” a classic toddler move.  When this is going on, someone in our family (usually me =)) suggest that she regain control of her daughter.  COME ON, J.  Can’t you get her to mind??  Classic phrases that she coined while the boys were toddlers.  And it just makes her more mad.  She is the first person to point out someone else’s shortcomings or wrongs, but the VERY LAST to apologize or admit that she could even be anywhere near the neighborhood of wrong.  As she is steadfast in this trait, I feel it is my responsibility to torture her further when her daughter is acting out.  Just another service I offer.  I must point out that I do not do this to be mean to her.  Since, she flat out refuses to apologize EVER, I feel that she should know what it feels like to be trying to parent the best you can and have some one nag you about it.  That’s all.

Quotes of the week

Well, this, of course.

My sisters and I watch Big Brother 9 faithfully…anyway it had a late start on Sunday due to the NCAA tourney. And we were waiting for 60 Minutes to be over. My youngest sister says, “How long is 60 Minutes on?” I’m not even kidding. I couldn’t stop laughing long enough to answer her question.  It will be a LONG time before she lives that one down.

My mom has a paddle that she has used to threaten to spank the grandkids with when she watched all four of the boys full-time. WHEN THEY WERE TODDLERS.  (Not to excuse, but to explain this behavior).  My middle sis was threatening her kids with spankings if they didn’t eat Easter dinner. Jake says, without skipping a beat…”The paddle’s right there if you need it.” For the record, I neither spank not threaten Jake to eat or anything else for that matter. Which may be why he is so skinny. However, I am not above bribing him.  Oh, and if you expect them to eat Easter dinner, don’t let them eat Easter candy for breakfast.  Just an idea.

That’s all I can think of for now. So tired. I may add to the list…maybe it will be a running list. That could be fun.

WOW. I need to get a life.

Arts and Crap

I have never really been an “artsy” person and anything that I try to make usually turns out, well, less than ideal.

My pregnant sister, who is on “bed rest,” has a two and a half year old daughter.  How anyone, especially someone with a toddler can be expected to stay in bed all day, is beyond me.  I digress, yet again.  So my sis is home with my niece and they are making fun little things out of paper plates and tissue paper and ribbon and such.  Fun, fun.  My brother-in-law gets home from work and my sister is trying to get my niece to tell him about the arts and crafts they made that day.

So she says, “Yeah, arts and crap.”  She will repeat it on command.  And it never gets old.  I so adore that girl. 

Seriously, you can not tell me that she is not the cutest thing you have ever seen.  Just look at that face.  Now picture it saying “Arts and crap!” with a big grin.  I love it. 

Mourning

Today, I will be going to the wake of a 22-year-old girl who was about 12 weeks pregnant.  She is a cousin of my brother-in-law.  They have a very tight-knit family.  I know most of their huge family.  And try as I might, I cannot wrap my head around why God would take her so young.  This will be the second funeral of a twenty-something that I have attended in my life.  I still don’t understand that one either.  I really want to understand what God’s will is in this, but as much as I think about this, which is pretty much constantly since it happened, I can’t get it.

And I think about what I would do if, God forbid, anything happened to Jake.  I think it would be the end of me.  I cannot even imagine my life without him.  He has grounded me and motivated me to do things I never thought possible.  I cannot imagine what this girl’s family is going through.  I just can’t.  I roll it over and over in my head, and I just can’t make sense of it.  I guess that’s why He is God and I am NOT.  I can just pray for this heart-broken family and love on them through their grief.  If you pray, send one up for them today.

They need it.

Done

Put a fork in me ’cause I am D-O-N-E.

I don’t like to complain, I really don’t.  But I am beat.  Beat down.  Tired of being the “go-to-girl.”  I am there, in full force, whenever anyone needs anything.  I gladly do so.

In return? I get disrespect in multiple forms.  It is exhausting. I can and am willing to give as much as I am capable of giving.  But when I get, figuratively, kicked in the teeth, well that just breaks my heart.  I guess I’m naive thinking that everyone is loving and happy and willing to help others. I don’t even want or need help.  Is respect too much to ask?

Apparently so.  I understand the respect is earned. And I am also realizing that people are cruel.  In most situations, it is in a passive-aggressive manner. Which just sickens me. Because they plan it and intend to behave that way.  In all this mess, as of late, I have learned to set strict boundaries.  I realize that when people don’t care about me, likely, will not give a hoot about boundaries I choose to set.  I have to set them for me.

Soon, I will take a vacation.  By myself.  It’ll just be me and Mexico.  ASAP.  The thought of it is just about the only thing getting me through.  That and my son, my niece, and my friend Becca.  They are the only reasons I’d even come back.

Sad

Thisis the most heartbreaking thing I have ever heard in my life. My brother-in-law is her cousin and my heart goes out to this family as they grieve such a tragic loss. It is almost incomprehensible. They are in my heart and my prayers.

If you pray, send on up for this family.  If you don’t, do it anyway. 

The irony is not lost on me

Today is my mom’s birthday and she had to work.  She works as an Activity Director at a nursing home about 45 minutes out of town.  Why she drives that far for work when there are about a kajillion nursing homes all over JoCo, I will never understand. 

Anyway, my two sisters and I didn’t have to work, so we surprised her at work with 2 dozen roses, balloons and a delish cake from Costco.  And two of her grandkids.  She was so excited and it was so worth the drive.  We even got to play some B-I-N-G-O.

The best part of this story is when mom was introducing us to her co-workers.  One of the women flashed us a gnarly, rotten tooth smile.  Hmm. Meth mouth.  Her name?  Krystal.

We laughed all the way home.

My new BFF

At work, there was a woman who was…psychotic.  But in the most pleasant way.  Religious preoccupation stood out as one of her main symptoms.  And she was quite vocal about how God was using her and how she was the “Mother Teresa of this institution.”  She talked and talked and I listened.  At times, I found it quite difficult not to just bust out laughing.  I giggled and managed to control it, somewhat.  Didn’t make much difference since, in her state, I don’t think she noticed anyway.  She rambled about Jesus and God and how Jesus’ jump drive was wired to God’s jump drive.  She talked of the hierarchy and the “lowerarchy.”  She even referred to me as Mother Teresa of the institution.  Now THAT is funny.  And endearing.  I appreciated the sentiment, even considering the source.  On and on she went, until retiring, finally, to her room.

As I did rounds, I walked past her room and in she beckoned me.  I was up for more amusement, so I went in to talk to her.  We chatted and I asked her about her pictures and where she lived.  Turns out that she is from the same small town that I am from and she went to school with my cousins.  And when I say small, I mean small.  In 2000, the population was 327.  Honestly, I was hoping this connection would bring her closer to reality-based thinking, but it did not.  What it did was further convince her of some spiritual connection.  She kept telling me that I was the blessed Mother Teresa of the institution.  I didn’t argue with her.  Of course, I know well enough to know that this could not be farther from the truth.  But it was a fixed delusion that I was willing to let her hang on to.  She hugged me and ranted, excitedly.  Then she told me that I act older than I am: I act 45, but look 25.

We both will be holding fast to that delusion.  And I am ordering us BFF necklaces.

Annual Review of Tina

Today, I had my yearly review at one of my jobs.  Earlier in the day, I asked my boss if I could talk to her for a few minutes.  She said needed to go over my review as well.  So we meet this afternoon.  I am never nervous at these things.  I don’t know if I just don’t care, or what, but to me, it is no big deal.  I walked into her office and the first thing she says is…”You’re not quitting, are you?”  Umm. No.  Then she said, “You’re not pregnant, are you??”  Pause.

No, just fat.  But thanks for asking. 

Then she thanked God and said that everthing was right in her world.  And gave me a near perfect review.

And tomorrow is my review at my other job.  And I have an interview for a third job tomorrow morning. 

I think I should feel overwhelmed, but I’m going to with optimisitc.  New opportunities, new adventures.