Marriage…or the lack thereof

22 10 2007

When I was with my soon-to-be ex-husband, I worked hard to try to live up to his expectations.  I was never good enough, and he constantly complained.  I repeatedly asked him what he wanted from me and I NEVER got a response from him.  And yet he continued to complain.  And he was verbally abusive, then he became physically abusive.  That is where I draw the line.  Many of the issues prior to the abuse were, in my opinion, deal-breakers.  But I stayed and would continue to work to make our home and life a happy one.  I can put up with about anything;  I am resilient and loving and continually look for the good in others.  NO ONE should put up with abuse. 

Now, he continually asks and wonders if I am seeing someone.  He wants to know how single life is treating me.  Single life is not ideal, but it is a hell of a lot better than having someone verbally and physically abuse me IN FRONT OF OUR SON.  And now he questions my actions and lifestyle??  We are not divorced yet.  I would not and could not consider starting a relationship at this point.  And, honestly, it will take me a long time to heal emotionally before I can even think about doing anything like that.  I want to get my life together, myself together.  And now he acts like he cares.  I don’t understand and probably never will.  I do know that a little of this would have gone a long way when we were together.  Now it is too late. 

And it still hurts like hell.



One response

23 10 2007
Big Pumpkin

All the warm love and hugs to you, honey. Stay strong. I’m with you. *smile*

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